December 28 - Mojave and beyond.........

December 28, 2010

In the middle of the Mojave Desert, stopped at a 76 station, filling up the car with $3.79 a gallon gas. In the middle of nowhere, it’s as good a price as any! EsPEcially since I am, as I said, in the Mojave Desert. That means I am on the road, seeing new sights, having another new adventure. NOT that living in Albuquerque with my dad ISN’T! It IS. So much of an adventure that I’m thrilled to be in the middle of the Mojave Desert. J

Christmas was an absolutely transformative experience for me this year. Both of my sisters live here now, as do two of my nieces; my other niece flew in from New York with her husband and stepdaughter, and my nephew came in from “the Bay area” for 4 days.

Back in a few - listening to Mitch Hedberg for a while. Do you know who he is? Never heard of him, but he sounds good so far.
OH, my gosh! That guy was funny!!! Was, because he died a few years ago. Bummer. Funny, funny.

Now it’s the 30^th, and a lot has happened. Decided Sunday morning that I wanted to go to California with my nephew; he was hauling a bunch of his belongings from my sister’s back to his place in Richmond, near SFO, and was going to do it all in 2 days by himself. Which seemed mammoth, AND I wanted a break from life as I knew it, take a roadtrip and get some new perspective. His plan was to leave Monday morning, which actually turned into Monday afternoon, a cold and gray day that made it seem even later. We had to be at his house and unloaded by Tuesday night, with minimum 16 hour drive. AND we did it. Drove 10-11 hours both days, stopping at a few places along the way to stretch, eat, and sightsee. Pretty cool sights. Cold, wet rain started about 3 hours out of San Francisco and continued all night, so unpacking his car (loaded to the hilt!) was a bit miserable. But again, it got done, and we ate and went to bed.

The trip was a good chance for us to be together, get caught up after not seeing each other for 4 years, and listen to some great music. One of my favorites that he had was George Harrison - first album he put out, and last album he put out. Wow. Really good listening. I’d never heard them before.

Now I’m waiting for a friend from my past to come pick me up and go spend a few days catching up and, I hope, resting!!! Seems that the last month has been nonstop. I put up decorations at dad’s house, as that’s something he hasn’t done in many years, and having lots of lights around has been a good addition. They add, well, light!, and he loves them, makes a big deal out of how they reflect off the white tile floor in the front hallway. Which IS pretty cool, actually! J Putting up the lights and tinsel, decorations and candles, was easy enough and fun to watch how they transformed the house, but something about the Manger scene really tugged at my emotions and made me edgy. It was strange. It was from that point that I started feeling sad, cranky, and impatient. Knowing that the energy of “the Season” had a lot to do with my feelings kept me from diving in too deeply, yet at the same time, it was impossible to just put them aside. So I had them.

Then I did a two day silent retreat, with meditation 7 hours a day. Whoa!!! As much as I swear by mediation, and do it regularly, the most I’d probably ever done at once was 45 minutes. So doing 50 minute meditations back to back for two days was a LOT!!! And to be in silence the whole time, too, was a big way of being with just me. Tough stint!  Super rewarding, for sure, AND fatiguing at the same time. To be still and silent for a lot of hours lets the body and mind realize how tired they are, and so take full advantage of the down time. The five days between the Retreat and Christmas were full of “stuff” coming to the surface to be recognized and let go, and it was HARD!!! Especially with all the fervor around Christmas going on at the same time.

But everything seemed to work out in good time, and the two days that I spent with all my family were excellent; everyone was in a good mood, healthy, and glad to be together. The feeling of harmony was strong. It made me so glad to be a part of it, to have gotten though (or over) my fears and hurts with my family members, and to know that my intention for peace is showing up more and more in my life. That’s good news! It encourages me to continue plowing through the muck, anticipating good outcomes, and loving what is in front of me now so that the good will be even better.

Friend’s here. Happy day!!!!